Saturday, August 30, 2008

Post-Practicum Reflections

Now that Practicum is over, I couldn't be more relieved.

The past 10 weeks were hell - facing those chatty and rowdy students, giving them assignments and having to mark them, chasing after them for anything from homework to journals, preparing for the next day's lessons, and most importantly, being on my guard against the school staff. School holidays like Youth Day and National Day offered only mere temporary respite from the teaching and marking, and even then, the invisible hands of the piles of essays would be beckoning me over to look at them when I should be watching the National Day fireworks in peace. Monday blues would set in on Sunday mornings instead, and last till Thursday evenings. And then, the politicking.

I came to a realisation that, actually, I love teaching. I love interacting with the cheeky and genuine students. I love imparting my knowledge to them. I love creating interesting lessons and seeing them enjoy them. I love telling them stories and global issues and watching their shocked or incredulous expressions. I love to see them apply what they have learnt from me into their work. I love to see my fruits of labour through their results. I love counselling them and seeing them take my advice and change their behavior. I love making a difference in their lives.

It is the institution and the system that I hate.

The school had been preventing me from enjoying my teaching experience fully. Something is wrong with that school. I have been unfortunate enough to work under a principal who detested me for some unknown reason and even accused me of walking out of a class earlier than I should. She did not verify it with me, but I was sure I would not do such a thing. When I finally came to know about it, it was 4 weeks later and she had already complained to my CTs, mentor and worse, my NIE supervisor (and probably all around the school). A prejudiced and backstabbing principal sure is an unprofessional principal, isn't it?

And there is something weird about the EL department too. The looks of the EL teachers there made me feel so unsettled, and I was very wary of them. In fact, I was just wary of everyone. I believe kind appearances are deceiving. Some of them just could not wait to catch me in my most inappropriate moments, like SMSing during staff meetings and turning up for hall assemblies late. Don't these people have anything better to do, like creating more meaningful lessons and marking more assignments? Oh, speaking of having better things to do, apparently, some teachers do not have any. I often saw them sipping coffee in the canteen and gossipping about other people (according to the drinks stall auntie who sometimes shared such gossip fodder with me, her loyal patron for her iced Milo). See, a good reason to be wary of them.

And one irritating fact about the school is its high absenteeism rate, not for the students, but for the teachers. Some ridiculous teachers were taking MCs twice every week, and on any given day, 8 teachers could be absent, creating numerous relief duties, which would be borne by us, the having-no-rights-to-reject-any-shit-work-given-to-us NIE trainees.

Overall, the education system, although lauded by many countries as a world-class education system and an ideal model, is far from being friendly to teachers. The work portfolio now includes teaching, marking, remedials, CCAs, school duties, committee duties, school meetings, going on fieldtrips, attending 100 hours of compulsory workshop training and coming up with new initiatives. Gone were the days where teachers used to leave at 1.40pm promptly everyday (and get a meagre $900 in those days). Although the pay and perks have improved, the work to be done is much more than what the pay commands. Work-life balance can only be achieved when you master the art of cooking and marking simultaneously, or you get your Girl Guides to babysit your kids while you oversee them practising their drills.

It's back to NIE next week. At last, I can catch my breath. Now I am wondering if I can last through the next three uncertain years.

I miss Hong Kong. I need to go trekking in the wilderness to rediscover myself.

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